i don't even remember the first ten tidbits, which have disappeared into the blogspot abyss, so i'm taking the liberty of starting over. rather than view this as the absolute height of vanity, i prefer to think of it as a pseudo-jungian exercise in self-reflection. if you buy that, i've got some property in west texas for sale; let's talk.
100. i like chocolate.
99. i don't like vegetables.
98. i'll eat carrots or celery, but only if slathered in ranch dressing. the veggies, not me.
97. i prefer mickey d's over booger king.
96. i'm a true meat 'n potatoes kinda gal.
95. i prefer baked to mashed.
94. i love TEXAS.
93. i'm only five feet one and 3/4 inches tall.
92. i have what's known as a "chihuahua complex".
91. i have a chihuahua. her name is chi chi.
90. i'm married to my college sweetheart.
89. i met him in an "honors ethics and moral issues" class.
88. i considered shooting him once, but i didn't.
87. i was a high school english teacher.
86. my favorite subject in high school was theatre.
85. my favorite subject in college was philosophy.
84. my favorite subject to teach was shakespeare.
83. i would re-name the elizabethan period "the dark ages" iffin i could.
82. i think people who drop "under God" from the pledge should be smacked.
81. florence king is one of my favorite authors.
80. i'm working on my own misanthropy.
I say booger king too...btw, isn't Florence King supposed to by the only conservative lesbo?
I hate to say it, but you have a long way to go if you are working on your misanthropy. If you are really serious about increasing the misanthropy, might I suggest daily readings of Ambrose Bierce or John Milton? Or maybe watch the opening half hour of Bad Santa over and over.
miss king admits herself that she wasn't picky when it came to fornication, but i think the term "lesbo" is not only too vulgar a word but also misleading.
mr. keilholtz, you always make me laugh. i'm working to rid myself of misanthropy, not to perfect it, silly.
Sorry. I listen to Howard Stern too much.
Smockmomma,
The advantage to being a misanthrope is that you are rarely disappointed with people. In fact, you are often pleasantly surprised. Expect the worst and rejoice that expectations were not lived up to.