....from the annual Bulwer Lytton contest for bad opening sentences:
Detective Fiction category:
Patricia wrote out the phrase 'It was a dark and stormy night' exactly seventy-two times, which was the same number of times she stabbed her now quickly-rotting husband, and the same number of pages she ripped out of 'He's Just Not That Into You' by Greg Behrendt to scatter around the room -- not because she was obsessive compulsive, or had any sentimental attachment to the number seventy-two, but because she'd always wanted to give those quacks at CSI a hard time.
Kari A. Stiller
College Station, TX
(And it was a Texas gal to boot! Yee Haw!)