You knew we had to say something about the dresses for the Oscars, didn't you? Well, here's what we're saying:
Lots of expensive gowns, few of which did their wearers justice.
Here's one tip. Lay off the satin. It looks terrible after you sit down in it (like in the limo!) even one time, and if you have even a soupcon of extra flesh, that shiny fabric just accentuates it.
Penelope, put the feathers down and get a dress where the top matches the bottom. J Lo, I think you're gorgeous, but that dress, while beautiful in concept, made you look heavy for some reason. Meryl--what can we say? We know you dress to please yourself, but this is ridiculous. Nicole? Eat something, darling. Cameron? You're wearing a folded napkin? Anne Hathaway? Loved you in The Devil...., but that bow? Eeeuw. Jada Pinkett Smith? I normally think you are aces on the red carpet, but this one didn't do it for me.
Who came in with thumbs up from MamaT? Not many, but these two led the pack:
Helen Mirren, who is absolutely stunning, and is not trying to look like something other than the age she is. I admire a woman who makes herself look fab, but does not try to compete with 21 year olds. This dress is beautiful, and it makes her look like a million bucks.
But the absolute winner of the night?
Abigail Breslin, who was nominated for Best Supporting Actress for her turn in Little Miss Sunshine. This dress is pretty, dressy, and completely appropriate for her age. Kudos to young Miss Breslin and to her mom, for keeping her the child that she is, but giving her a princess dress to wear. Lovely.