always a sucker for the latest craze

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i'm supposed to "name ten things that iíve done that i think my readers havenít done" but this is close enough:

1. was disgnosed with chronic fatigue syndrome before finding out i was actually suffering from legionnaires' disease.

2. experienced menopause at the tender young age of nineteen -- no kidding. and was healed by God Himself through a "faith-healer" -- still not kidding.

3. survived a car accident that took "the jaws of life" to rescue me from my car -- amazingly, my first thought as i was pinned into my car with the windshield shattered into my head and neck, was "damn, i think i spilled my coke on the seat. my dad's gonna kill me."

4. did a strip tease at my not-yet hubby's place of employment.

5. had a short story entitled "mandy's picnic" (about a woman who killed and ate her boyfriend) published.

6. [censored]

7. got reprimanded by a bobby for hanging on the front gates of buckingham palace.

8. met our number one local television anchor at a big shindig and, not knowing who she was asked, "so, what do you do?"

9. won first runner up prize in a drag show and was titled "miss the real thang."

10. have lived in every region of this great state of TEXAS. yee-HAW!

8 Comments

8. met our number one local television anchor at a big shindig and, not knowing who she was asked, "so, what do you do?"

I almost did something similar. We were at a fundraiser for a foundation that was started by and run by a famous Olympic figure skater. Since I loathe figure skating I had no idea what the host looked like (OK, I knew that she was young, pretty, and Asian American, but that didn't narrow things down that much at this party). We found ourselves talking to a very pleasant young woman. Fortunately, about thirty seconds before I dropped the bomb, someone else came up and made the formal introductions.

"4. did a strip tease at my not-yet hubby's place of employment."

What?

Yes, and what about no. 6?

Wildsmock, based on your other entries, I suspect your [censored] is far more worthy of censorship than mine!

i assure you, father, that there was far more tease than strip. does that help shave some of the purgatory points?

Umm... Wow. Pretty impressive.

Which region, in your opinion, is the best in Texas? I've only been to beautiful San Antoine and the equally beautiful hill country. And is it true that "back in Luckenbach, Texas, ain't nobody feelin' no pain" because they're drunk & don't have jobs? (just a joke!)

it depends on what strikes your fancy, TSO, because in TEXAS we have it all.

if hard pressed, i'll admit that west TEXAS has the most beautiful sunsets and is probably my fave.

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This page contains a single entry by smockmomma published on March 5, 2005 10:16 PM.

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