the naughty wife. she can't pick coffee.
but she can swallow a few tape worms to lose those unwanted pounds.
and hey, with a little help from del monte, she can open catsup bottles!
and with a few extra chemicals to quell the morning sickness, she can still cook those early morning meals for you!
and, hey, looky here! those extra "vitamins" help her fly through her chores and keep her looking darn cute in the process!
and why not buy your little lady that extra fancy kitchen gadgetry she's been hinting you get her? maybe if you do ...
she'll let you blow smoke in her face. yeah, buddy.
i need. some of those vitamins.
you just need a good night's sleep, little mama. you'll be up for one in ... ohhhh ... twenty years?
Oh, dear. As if I needed another reason to hate everything. I'm already giving St. Jerome, one of the all-time great misanthropes, a run for his money.